Relearning what I didn't know I knew?

So, let it be said that, going back to school (that's only part of where I've been) has been a surprisingly joyous experience for me.  I've found a school that, is not only taking my 14 year old credits (teens, unpredictable at best) but has an accredited Creative Writing degree.  Oddly its a BA not a BFA but I'll split hairs later. Bottom line?  Two years.  Two years and I've finally got a degree, and not having a 4 year degree in ANYTHING has haunted me on the job front to say the least.  They also have a a MBA in the same area which is really my goal.  Teaching writing on the college level would be a dream career for me.  Having the credentials that seem requisite to write my own books on writing and storytelling is also a major deciding factor in my degree focus.

One reason for going back to school is this fucking self doubt I can't shake.  It's like I know my writing is almost there but I can't shake the feeling that I'm missing some small bit of something.  A lot of my studies right now are just recap.  I've done quite a bit of craft research and study on my own over the years.  I am finding new things as well, things about pacing and leaving gaps that cause the reader to have to engage more that I never really thought about.  I look back at my writing and I see a lot of these newly defined elements (new to me at least) are there I just wasn't conscious of them.  Like grammar, I don't know all the rules, I just say and write what sounds right to me.  Thankfully my parents are both well read and intelligent people or I might not have developed that ear living so close to Kentucky.

And where is my muse in all this?  Bemused.  Standoffish but then engaged.  She isn't calling the shots but dives in with gusto when I get my assignments.  She's being reasonable and that is a bit frightening.  I think she's planning a mutiny a few months from graduation.  I must wait and see and keep my nails neatly trimmed as not to chew them.  That bitch is scary sometimes.

Listening to: The Litter River Band - The Night Owls  Yeah I'm going old old school.